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Thursday, June 13, 2013

Last day

   Today was my last day in this school, in this class. Tomorrow is the prom, we have the exams in two weeks and then everything is over. They will be all gone.

   I took laxatives this morning and didn't have the chance to use a bathroom for 8 hours. I was in hell. I started getting the chills around noon (6 hours after taking the pills). I felt cold, sick, nauseated. At some point, the pain was incredible, I couldn't walk. I lived in hell for about two hours. I hope that no one will ever have to experience such pain. The awful thing is, I also had to keep all the shit inside me, but it was so hard. I felt like I would explode. I was sweaty and cold.
   As soon as I entered the house, I ran into the bathroom and let it all out. I was praying, thanking God for keeping me alive and clean. My body and clothes were wet. My hair was wet. I must have spent around 15 minutes on the toilet, almost crying, shaking, with my eyes closed. Then I took off my slightly wet shirt and lay on the bed, eyes closed, imagining I was a dying person, because this is what it felt like.
   Otherwise, my day was nice.

   Tomorrow will be an amazing, but sad, day. I finished the year with a 9.81 (10 being the highest) average, the 4th of my class. We are a genius class.
   We also had some ribbons with many layers on which people wrote. 24 out of my 28 classmates wrote on them, but some teachers did, too. My English teacher wrote "Nice, wonderful kid. Stay positive and be lucky. Hugs, teacher" and I had tears in my eyes while she was writing it. She is my favourite teacher, but she isn't coming to our prom... such a shame. My German teacher wrote that she was very proud of me, that I am an amazing person. She was holding back her tears after she finished writing. These days are incredibly emotional, I will never forget them.

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