Out of the blue

   The house is full of boxes, we're moving out tomorrow. A lot of things have happened since my last post.

   The most interesting one would be that I went out with my ex. We went in some woods with a tent. At some point, we started kissing and making out, we did things we had never done before, went farther than ever (no, we didn't have sex). Those few hours were romantic and I never wanted them to end. I felt like a slut, don't know why, maybe because he only seemed to have done it for fun, while I also did it because I was still in love with him. An hour later, he texted me and said he figured out he cared a lot about me. He has this female friend who's his age. They talk a lot and he always tells me about her, it is bothering me. I tried to give him some signals, to make him understand that I don't need to know about her. In addition, he's telling me a lot of things about his friends, but his friends don't even know who I am. Does that mean that I'm too important for him and he wants to "keep" me for himself, or does it mean that I'm not important at all? The story is very long, but to make it short, I've decided to stay away from him for a day or two, because he's hurting me.

   Things have been okay school-wise. I have the highest admission grade in my class, it was a 9.71, and the person right below me had a 9.06. It is much lower than mine, the grade below me would have usually been a 9.69 or something like that, then 9.65 and so on. Other than mine, the grades in my class are very close one to another, so this only proves that I'm smarter and more hard-working that my future classmates.

   I am leaving tomorrow and it's saddening me. I don't even want to think about it, it doesn't seem real. Is anyone still reading my blog?