I enter the pharmacy.
"One Dulcolax and one Nurofen box, please."
"Nurofen - simple or Forte?"
("Which one is cheaper?") "Simple."
She grabs a box and comes back to me.
"Who is the Dulcolax for?"
"Oh, um, for my mother."
"She could use some detox pills instead, with fiber." ["So willing to help, these pharmacists.."]
"I don't know, she just told me to buy Dulcolax."
She takes the box.
"That would be 30 (RON*)."
Fuck, I have exactly 31. Thank God it didn't cost any more. I leave the pharmacy stumbling over the stairs.
*RON = the currency in my country.
It is 10 pm now, I have already taken 10 laxatives. I take the box of Nurofen, read the little paper inside it: Do not take more than six pills a day. Six, you say? Cool, I take six pills, put them in my mouth (they filled it) and swallowed with water. The rest will come later, the night is long.. Maybe I'll sleep much, maybe I'll feel sick and dizzy and nauseated, maybe I'll have to be taken to the hospital, or who knows, I might die! No way, you can't die from a few pills, but still. They say you can hallucinate or have blurry vision, oh how I can't wait.
I want to watch the sunrise in the morning. I will watch the sunrise.
And no, of course I didn't plan killing myself for the last two days. I am just fine.