I walk in.
"Hello, do you have any Dulcolax?"
"Yes, we do." (of course you do, damn.)
"Two boxes, please." (because I can't fit more into my purse)
"Two? Who uses so many laxatives? Do you use them to lose weight?" (imagine sarcastic, ironic, god-that's-so-stupid tone)
"Oh, no no no. My mom told me to buy a box for her and one for grandma." (what you don't know is that I'll use "this many laxatives" in 4 days. how fucked am I?)
"Ok, here you are. 26 RON." (that's our currency. it's worth 7 bucks)
"Thank you. Bye."
I walk out. I am smiling. On the inside, I am laughing my ass off.
Edit: Oh oh oh. Something more. I think I walked past my first ex (you know, the one I was together with when I started having "trouble") yesterday, twice. We've both seen each other, though none of us said anything. I must admit I kind of went on that street purposely, to see if he's out and if my second ex (the one I broke up with recently) is out. By the way, today is his birthday and I just texted him, he said "Thanks :))." I suppose it's okay. My first ex's birthday is in a few days too, I think, but he never ever told me when it was. I think it's the 24th, but I'm not sure. Ok, enough about exes. I'm on lax and I have cramps. Yaaaay.