Monday, May 7, 2012

A mess

My head is spinning and my thoughts are racing; actually, my mind is idle, there is nothing left inside. I want to vanish, to be gone, to turn to ashes. I do not know how, I don't even know if this world is real. What if it's just another stupid joke? What if it's all just a nightmare where you can do anything, and nothing will happen to you? People are afraid to jump from buildings in their dreams, because they do not know it's a dream. Maybe life is a dream, maybe we should jump to wake up, to be really awake. To make the nightmare stop and what is real to begin.

And so I lose my mind somewhere in between binge and purge and vomit on my face and undone homework and God knows what.

And so I wait for my breath to magically kill me, because everything else has failed.

I'd be glad to go.

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