Hate hate hate. Hate is flowing through my body, I can't think, I want to slit my wrists so many times that the razor breaks, I want to break my bones, cut off my head, jump out a thousand windows, beat up everyone I see, make them bleed, get a dagger and make myself bleed to death, take out my eyes and squeeze them, take my limbs and break them in a million pieces. I want to eat all the food in the world until I can't anymore, then throw it up, throw up everything, throw up my intestines and stomach and throat and esophagus and lungs and spline and bladder, make everything come out through my throat then cut off my fucking neck and eat all my organs again, then throw them back up. I want to smell death, ants and spiders and snakes crawling up my corpse, eating me. Birds, black crows eating from my flesh, hungry vultures devouring me, the acid turning my skin green, a putrid green, like a zombie. I want to take out my heart and pour the blood down my throat, wash my teeth with it then again - throw it up. I want to take each and every person and do the same thing with them - devour them and let them be devoured by mad animals. Everyone except for one person, one damn person who won't even give a shit.
I want to turn to ashes and be blown away by the wind. I want to be dead, motherfucking dead. Eat nothing for the rest of my life, become a skeleton, a real skeleton, then be broken and burnt until I'm just ashes, ashes, ashes. Then I'll be gone and I'll find peace. I'll find peace..