I lost weight while eating, which seemed totally impossible until now. I knew it was possible for everyone else, just not for me. I have eaten more today, since it is a weekend-day and I am home. But I went to the gym, burned 600 calories and first ate at four o'clock in the afternoon. I came home and ate a little more, then had a proper dinner. I feel full now, but not a "God, I could explode anytime now," but more like "It is okay, I have eaten, and even if the scale shows a major gain, I know it is food weight and even more water weight. I will not eat anything else, not because I feel I have
*I feel I have eaten too much. First, in the "anything-above-zero-is-too-much" way, but I can live with that for now. Secondly, I feel bloated and uncomfortable, but I pray to God it will pass and that I won't wake up and freak out because the scale shows too much.
I weighed 57.3 this morning, after the laxatives. Since laxative loss quickly comes back, I should be around 57.5, and because I have eaten more today, maybe somewhere around 57.7-.8, because right after eating I weighed 58.9, but I hope I will lose at least one kilo overnight.. That's how it works when I don't binge. One thing I always thought, but never actually said: Eating disorders help you practice Maths.
I want to play World of Warcraft. I played for an hour at school, it is exactly the same as The Age of Empires (the version I used to play in 2004-2005.. such a long time ago), but instead of humans, it has monsters. I don't like the creatures so much, but I'd love to try something new.
I should also write some more Random Journal Entries. Just.. not now.
Check out the quiet place.